Monday, December 26, 2005

ADD videos

Videos of and by ADD - by my nephew Adam and his friends. He's the director, producer, editor, etc. My favorite video is the "Kung Fu" video.

funny video

David Lavon and the Chevra. Funny video of young Jewish guys singing and dancing in the streets of London, Israel, and parts of the U.S.

Friday, December 23, 2005

unintentionally sexually suggestive comic book covers

It's all in how you look at it... but these analyses are pretty funny!

joke - hubby who forgot anniversary

A husband was in big trouble when he forgot his wedding anniversary.

His wife told him "Tomorrow there'd better be something in the driveway for
me that goes zero to 200 in 2 seconds flat."

The next morning the wife found a small package in the driveway.

She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.

Funeral arrangements for the husband have been set for Saturday.

Thursday, December 22, 2005

Well, the boss said to do it!

funny sign: keep off the grass


Too late. It's already been trampled!

You should still be a good person... even if this quote is depressing

"Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting the bull not to attack you because you're a vegetarian."

-Dennis Wholey

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

For Men: dangerous and safe approaches to use during PMS

> DANGEROUS: What's for dinner?
> SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?
> SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?
> ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate
>
> DANGEROUS: Are you wearing that?
> SAFER: Wow, you look good in brown.
> SAFEST: WOW! Look at you!
> ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate
>
> DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?
> SAFER: Could we be overreacting?
> SAFEST: Here's my paycheque.
> ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate
>
> DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?
> SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.
> SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?
> ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate
>
> DANGEROUS: What did you do all day?
> SAFER: I hope you didn't overdo it today.
> SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe!
> ULTRA SAFE: Have some more chocolate.

Monday, December 19, 2005

math test questions (baby blues cartoon)

Hippo snuggling with tortois (incl. photos)











This is adorable. A hippo befriended a tortois. I checked this on Snopes and it's true. Read on:

NAIROBI(AFP) - A baby hippopotamus that survived the tsunami waves on the Kenyan coast has formed a strong bond with a giant male century-old tortoise, in an animal facility in the port city ofMombassa, officials said.The hippopotamus, nicknamedOwenand weighing about 300 kilograms (650 pounds), was swept down Sabaki River into the Indian Ocean, then forced back to shore when tsunami waves struck the Kenyan coast on December 26, before wildlife rangers rescued him."It is incredible. A-less-than-a-year-old hippo has adopted a male tortoise, about acentury old, and the tortoise seems to be very happy with being a 'mother'," ecologistPaula Kahumbu,who is in charge of Lafarge Park, told AFP.

"After it was swept and lost its mother, the hippo was traumatized. It had to look for something to be a surrogate mother. Fortunately, it landed on the tortoise and established a strong bond. They swim, eat and sleep together," the ecologist added. "The hippo follows the tortoise exactly the way it follows its mother. If somebody approaches the tortoise, the hippo becomes aggressive, as if protecting its biologicalmother," Kahumbu added. "The hippo is a young baby,he was left at a very tender age and by nature, hippos are social animals that like to stay with their mothers for four years," he explained.
...
(Corny but the footnote appearing w/this story does have a point.) This story shows that our differences don't matter much when we need the comfort of another. We could all learn a lesson from these two creatures of nature; Look beyond the differences and find a way to walk the path together.

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

New Video Game Designed To Have No Influence On Kids' Behavior

I'm laughing at this article about a new video game "Stacker" where one stacks boxes. Here's a short clip (or read the whole article, from the Onion, here).

Take-Two executives said they were inspired by "real critics."

"We're just giving kids what their parents say they need," said Take-Two vice president of marketing Allyson Spicer. "In today's economic environment, it's foolish not to listen to the people who dislike everything about our products."

Though some have compared Stacker to Tetris, those within the industry have been quick to draw distinctions between the two games.

"Tetris' suggestively twisting and turning blocks, violent falling motions, and increasingly frenzied suspense are a potential influence on children," said video-game ethicist Steve Contreras. "By contrast, after playing Stacker, with its eternally unchanging shapes and gentle lowering actions, I doubt a child would ever want to arrange any sort of virtual block again. This is exactly what this controversial industry needed to rescue its reputation."

Cuteness overload


I am going to shrivel up and die. I can't believe some of these adorable pictures at Cuteoverload.com. This picture looks just like my dog!

Monday, December 12, 2005

How life on earth *really* started


(From the Funny Times cartoon archive)

Sunday, December 11, 2005

Don't eat beans if you're going to put on a wetsuit

Tuesday, December 6, 2005

blonde driver

Friday, December 2, 2005

more Jewish jokes

Q. In the Jewish doctrine, when does the fetus become human?
A. When it graduates from medical school.

Q. What is the technical term for a Jewish woman who catches her husband in the act with his secretary?
A. "The Plaintiff."

Q. What is the difference between a Jewish Grandmother and an Italian Grandmother?
A. The accent.